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121、Today, my dad gave me a promise ring on my one year anniversary with my boyfriend and made me swear I would wait til marriage. Four hours later he walked in on us having sex in my bedroom. FML
今天，我老爹在我和我男友交往一周年时给了我一个“约定戒指”，让我发誓说一直等到结婚之后（再做爱做的事）。四个小时之后，他就撞见了我们在我的卧室里面OOXX。FML
122、Today, my family and I were at a restaurant. We're Swedish and love talking about people in our language because no one ever understands here. I decided to comment about how ugly the girl at the next table was. She turned around and goes "Dra åt helvete." That's Swedish for "Go to hell." FML
今天，我们一家去饭店吃饭。我们是瑞典人，所以我们特别喜欢用瑞典语谈论其他人因为在这里没人能听得懂。我开始评论我们旁边桌子上的一个女孩是多么地难看。她转了过来来了句“Dra åt helvete.”就是瑞典语的“去死吧。”FML
123、Today, I was bored and decided it would be fun to pretend to be an undercover cop and pull over other cars. The first car I pulled over was a real undercover cop. FML
今天，我感到很无聊，所以觉得如果我假装成便衣pol.ice然后让其他人在道边上停车一定很有趣。结果我停下的第一辆车（的司机）是个真的便衣pol.ice。FML
124、Today, I was eating cereal and decided to warm it up to see what it tasted like. So, using a candle in the room I placed my spoon over the flame and waited to see if it heated up. Pleased with my silly experiment, I put the spoon back in my mouth. I now can't talk because of my swollen tongue. FML
今天，我在吃麦片，然后决定把它加热一下，看看味道会变成啥样。所以，我用了根房间里的蜡烛，把我的勺子置于火焰之上，等着看麦片是不是被加热了。我感到这个愚蠢的小实验很有趣，然后就把勺子放回了嘴里。我现在舌头肿得不能说话。FML
125、Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML
今天，我和我的一些女性朋友去看电影。坐在我们身后的那个哥们一直在发出粗重的、有点变态的喘息声，所以我们朝他扔了些爆米花。电影结束的时候，我们看到他坐着轮椅——脖子里插着根呼吸管。FML
126、Today, completely nude, I had to collect my clothes around the boy’s apartment I have been sleeping with for awhile. While his girlfriend watched to make sure I “got the f*** out.” FML
今天，我完全光着身子，在最近一直和我上床的男生的公寓里面四处搜寻我的衣服。他的女朋友监视着我，为了确定我“他喵的快滚”。FML
127、Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 2 hours with my boyfriend and the guy that I have been secretly having sex with for 6 months. FML
今天，我和我的男朋友、以及我交往了6个月的秘密炮_友一起卡在电梯里卡了两个小时。FML
128、Today, I went to a party and the cops came to bust the party. I jumped out the window of a second story house in order to avoid getting arrested. I broke my leg in three places and got a concussion. The cops let everyone go with a warning. FML
今天，我去参加了个派对，突然pol.ice来搅局。我从二楼的窗户跳了出去避免被抓。我摔得脑震荡而且腿摔断了三处。pol.ice不过给了大家警告，然后就让所有人散了。FML
129、Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML
今天，我打算向吃掉我的花园植物的兔子复仇。它回来的时候就站在我崭新的地上游泳池旁边。我拿起我的22.口径来复枪就是一枪——可是我打偏了，子弹打穿了我的游泳池。15000加仑的水把我的地下室淹了个透。FML
130、Today, I decided to cheat on my math test by writing a couple equations on my hand. Totally satisfied, I handed my test in feeling like I had aced it. As I was heading toward the door, I happily waved goodbye to my teacher. She saw everything. FML
今天，我决定在数学考试上作弊，就在我的手心里写了些式子。我感觉非常得意，交卷了以后觉得我考得特好。于是我一边走向教室门一边向我的老师挥手告别——结果她全看见了。FML |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-8-13 19:57
显身卡
发表于 2009-8-14 12:53
